Why Lie Detector Wont WorkWhy Lie Detector Tests Dont Work For Jealous Lovers, Cheats, and unruly Gang members. Why Lie Detector Test? This instrument when used for jealous lovers and people with serious trust issues is defunct!! How many times do we need to watch people so convinced of their partners' disloyalty that they will go on national TV to prove it? And then to find that all their accusations have come to nought, as the accused has told the truth all along. This proof of lolyalty does not mean that the accuser will now walk away and be happy ever after with his/her beloved. Such mistrust, underlies something that goes way deeper than a superficial scratch, that can be healed with the sticking plaster of a Lie Detector Test. People who are convinced that their wife/husband, has been and is sleeping with the neighbour, the mail person, family members and the pizza delivery boy/girl all at the same time is possibly pathologically suspicious. People such as this need help, professional help!! All the Lie Detector Tests in the world are not going to appease such a person, certainly not for long. Living with people who have so little trust can only be described as a living hell!! My advice is, if a partner in the 'gang' is hitting out verbally and physically, get out. If the abuse is only verbal, (fOR THIS IS A TYPE OF ABUSE) and he/she is willing to seek help then use your own judgement. But be warned that repetitive accusations and controlling behaviour, which usually goes hand in hand with jealousy, will wear down even strong personalitys and deminish self worth. The other side of the coin is when the accuser is proved to be right about the un-faithfulness of the other. So Often they, the cheated, believe the acts of contrition, and decide to stay after the accused has kissed their hands feet and every other place. Cheaters who cheat multiple times are unlikely to change their ways. They may for a time be 'good'. Being good for some multiple cheaters may be as long as a month or two but they very rarely stop until death do them part! As such multiple Lie Detector Tests wont stop them either. The best that the cheated one can expect, is multiple kisses of the aforementioned body parts. In this case the person who stays should seek professional help in gaining back their self worth. As sadly people who stay in a cheaters relationship tend to want to prove that they are worth loving, and accept the point of view that the problem must lie within themselves and their inability to keep someone loving them.
Children who undergo Lie Detector tests in order for their parents to find out whether or not their children have been sleeping around, prostituting themselves, taking drugs, stealing hanging with known gangs etc, are usually doing it all. No parent is that dumb that they are going to be suspicious about all of these things without some fairly strong evidence! In which case their children are going to treat them with the contempt that they deserve for whining and doing nothing concrete about it.Children will lie if they feel that lying is the shortest route to peace and independent coming and going. Possibly the only good to come out of such shows is boot camp for them and some parenting classes for the parents, albeit sometimes a little late for children already in their teens. Lie Detector Tests at best, are a wake up call for the parents and a minute of embarassment for the kids involved. At worst if the parent is wrong it could mean a lifetime of humiliation and hurt. THINKING, that a child might be doing something that is potentially self destructive and life ruining, is not good enough for an accusation! Find the evidence first. Is money going missing and who in the house has the opportunity to take it? Is a child/ren, Gang member, out until all hours of the night? Or is he/she bunking out through the window at night? Check his/her bookbag,(yes, you have that right in order to protect a child). Check the whole room for drugs of any kind. Reasons like 'I kept the stuff for my friend', are nine times out of ten, an out and out lie! Do they keep coming home with the smell of booze on their breath? Do they have money that you did not give them to buy expensive items, or make up and cosmetics? Do they get given expensive items by a someone unknown and who has never been introduced? Are they hanging with a gang of older boys and girls? Firstly if any or all of these things are going on, there is really no reason for a Lie Detector test. The truth is in the evidence, (all of the above) if there is any, THEN there is good reason to alter the method of discipline and everyday interaction in general. Every parent should do random checks on bedrooms, bags, friends and making sure that their children are where they say they are! Do not consider this an infringement of their rights to privacy. Rights and privacy come when they are old enough to know what to do with them. It is a parents duty to keep their children safe and a childs' right to be kept safe. A special note of caution here, is that random checks do not include paranoid or military style parenting, this would simply mean going from one extreme to another. Always talk with your children and their gang of friends. Keep the invitation to chat open, and show interest in what they are doing. Chances are if the kids get more than a bit tetchy about their comings and goings, or their friends, they may well have something to hide. Even if it is a small detail like not doing all their homework before going out. Expect children to behave like children and you will not be disappointed. Even well behaved children are still children and they will do dumb things sometimes. Remember even great parents get fooled sometimes! The fact is that most parents who know their own children well, will know when they are lying without the Lie Detector Test. Lie Detector Tests are not going to go away any time soon. People love watching others squirm and live TV shows that expose liars and cheats, have become the Spartans arena of the modern world. There are no gladiators in the ring, only fallible human beings, but they provide an outlet for an audience who like to boo and hiss,(the modern day stones and tomatoes). And if they help one parent to be a better parent and one child to get his/her life back on track then I guess they will have done the job they are supposedly used for. As a matter of interest, Lie detector tests should not be done on someone who is under the influence of drugs! The read out could well be unreliable. My personal experience of Lies and being lied to, is in the first instance I am totally rubbish at lying, I simply cannot! I have little tolerance for lies from other people and even less from the people I love and have brought into this world. I am, when it comes to my children a great lie detector! I know their faces, their eyes and the soul behind them all too well. That is not to say that they have never gottten away with the odd bit of teenage pranking about and less than brilliant behaviour. But for the most part when I have asked them about a paticular instance, they know that I am much nicer under the truth than I am being lied to. ( Of course they are adults now and they have the delights of figuring out their own children. I have no doubt that they will know their own as well as I knew them when it came to telling lies.) There are some very rare children who may have underlying sociopathic tendencies, and they may fool even the best of the best. For these parents I believe they have the hardest task of all and I wish them strength and love. But remember this is very rare!
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