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Family Gang and Extended Members, Gran, Grandad, Aunts and Uncles.Family Gang and extended members who join together in the raising of a child or many children, can only benefit an otherwise under-supervised child or an overly stressed parent. These benefits include teaching children good social behaviour, respect for their elders and gives them more than one person to ask advice from, (even though some maybe prickly and others magical in instruction). It also provides an understanding of their place in the family structure. Parents too, gain from having a safe place for their child or children to go to from time to time when they need a break, or even when the child needs a break from them. Life is full of unexpected surprises and most of them tend to be stressful. Even preparing for a holiday with kids can be stressful as well as exciting.Having a close knit Family Gang that helps out can create a buffer and safe haven for both adults and children alike. There is a benefit for other Family Gang members in looking after children, often gained in the most unexpected ways. Ask me, it is not possible to focus on personal problems with kids around, especially when they are not yours, as we tend to look after other peoples kids extra carefully. Aside from that who can resist a little sticky hand carefully wiping at the mole on your cheek, little face fixed in consternation when it wont come off! Any 'time,' that we feel we may lose in taking care of a child, is swiftly forgotten when that little body lies trustingly in your arms and falls asleep. We then find the time to linger and allow our eyes to rest on the curve of a cheek that is shaded with those disgustingly long eyelashes that all little kids seem to be blessed with. And oh my Lord! they like to hear you singing too!! Get in while you can! Children have the ability to soften even the hardest of us. The obvious problems of who's way is best at raising children really does not need to raise it's ugly head. We all have our own special tried and tested methods and we all like to feel that some of these methods may help either the parents or the extended gang member who is looking after the children. My mother-in-law, my personal genie, taught me more than a thing or two about looking after other peoples children. Firstly, she never critisised my methods of discipline even though they were far harsher than her own. She handed my precious children back to me from the moment I came home from work, and she was always magically there when I really needed the benefit of her experience. For my part I took heed and allowed her to treat my children the way she saw best and always thanked her from the bottom of my heart. This lovely woman had ten children of her own, (hows that for a Family Gang) and still had time for mine and all the other many grand children. Who am I to find fault!! Having many brothers-in-law as extended Family Gang members was a life saver for me, and my son. Having lost his father when he was only 8 months old I soon found out how he was drawn to them when finding that his little body looked more like theirs than mine! Not a big deal you think, but it was to him! Besides they rode motor bikes and carried him around on their shoulders! Far better than just having me as his horse to ride around on in the lounge. My daughter too, benefitted from having 5 aunts as well as my magic mother-in-law. There was always someone to tend to her needs when I was involved in cooking or washing nappies etc, [not so much of a problem today with throw away nappies]. They were there too when I worked away from home, for job availability reasons. Life throws us some huge curve balls at times and then we need all the help we can get from our Family Gangs. Other small but not inconsequential benefits that extended Family Gang members offer, are their varied tastes, opinions, experiences and preferred cuisine. Not necessarily in that order but you get the picture. These are all things that are put on the table for sampling! An example of family variation and options for holidays is camping. My daughter and I are not that keen, but my son and his wife love it and often take his niece, my grand daughter with them who has a great time, swimming, fishing and joining in the camp site games and barbeques. Family Gang is important in so many ways, that unless we are talking 'Cosa Nostra' family member, do not leave them out of your life or your childs'. The older we get the more we find a need to belong and there is no-one and nowhere we belong more, than family and home. Let us not forget that raising children in general is no small thing and raising children with special difficulties can be even harder. Take all the help that is on offer and the help of those parents who are kind enough to share their own experiences with the wider world. For anyone who needs some inspiration and help dealing with autism there is a special link below: Thesoundhemakes. Single moms really can have a hard time and finding the right man is a potential mine field. Unfortunately all of us have a stereotypical idea of the ideal man and often we are wrong for various reasons. Many of us ladies go for the 'bad boys' and run the risk of introducing children to them, who may be let down when the 'bad boy' moves on. Not all of them make for bad partnerships, but you have to figure what got him that reputation. Never fall for the old 'I can change him' voice in your head it rarely, if ever works! We are who we are! More often than not the only ones doing the changing is us, from confident, to low self esteem. Any help we can get to pick the right man should be considered especially when the advice comes from someone who has been there and taken the time to investigate the usual hurdles we put in front of ourselves, Shay Williams is a dating and relationship expert, to find her book, Click Here!
The Sound He Makes
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